Regret

Regret is a negative conscious and emotional reaction to personal past acts and behaviors. Regret is often felt when someone feels sadness, shame, embarrassment, depression, annoyance and guilt after committing an action or actions that the person later wishes that he or she had not done. (Taken from wikipedia)

As the picture itself said that there are things in our life we wish we could take back but it is impossible unless there is a time machine. (Doraemon?)

All these years of my life, I don't know how much regrets I had already been through. Whenever I recall about some of my regrets, I will always think "Aiya, if I didn't do this/that, then this/that won't happen liaw. Things will be different liaw."

Some of the regrets, I can just let them go. But, some of them I couldn't let them go at all...I still carry them with me until today. One of them would be my dream of becoming a badminton state player.

When I was young(7~8 years old?), I always watch my cousins playing badminton but at that time, I never dare to try because I really don't know how to hit the shuttle. There was one time, they keep ask me to try, so yeah, I finally held the racket and try to play. Obviously, I missed all the shot given to me. I really feel like giving up that time, thinking that badminton is not meant to be for me. Just when I had that thinking in mind, I miraculously hit the shuttle! I was so excited but err...the shuttle went onto the roof =.= That is when I gain the confident of playing badminton. From then onwards, I will always join in to play with my cousins.

Soon, upgrade..My mum have her own racket which she used last time. My dad is also a badminton player. So everything needed to play badminton is set except for the net. Even at home, I will play it with my mum. Practice how to serve and hit accurately. That time still noob, pick shuttle more than I hit.

As time passes, I got better. Upgrade again. I got my own racket + I went to a badminton court to play. Now, we have the badminton net, no more kampung style playing outside of the house. With not much wind interruption inside a court, I practice to hit the shuttle harder.Slowly learn how to smash...basic drop while also observing how others played in the court.

At home, I also watch badminton on tv. Those pro plays really amazed me that time. I really wished I could play like them. I wanted to go for badminton training. I consult my parents about it and the answer is obviously a no, no why, just no. These are the possible reason of which my parents never told me that time:

1)The badminton training place is 1 hr+ away from my home. Very troublesome
2)I am studying...

Recently, I watched on youtube about Malaysia MD pair, TBH and KKK where they shared about their life. It was once broadcasted at Astro AEC few yrs ago after TBH and KKK won for Malaysia, the first MD championship at All England Open.

They both, like me, had the love of playing badminton. In order to go for training, they had to separate from their family to go elsewhere far away from their hometown to train + study. As TBH's mum did share that she was very sad to have TBH leaving the house at such young age and she would cried everyday whenever she miss TBH. This might be the same case for my family, who knows?

And I think my parents were worried that by allowing me to go training, it would influence my studies, hence my future. I had learnt that badminton training life + study life together is very tension. Wake up early in the morning to go school and after that, intensive badminton training. This might be what my parents were thinking =/

Brunei, as we know, I don't think any state player still representing Brunei to join any badminton open or mayb 1~2 do participate and perhaps got knocked out in early stage. Looking at this, my dad also have no intention of sending me there to train. It is as if I would be a champion next time like TBH and KKK.

The only time I went through badminton training was during form 5(just a normal training every sunday). I represented my school to participate in few district tournaments. Results? Lost. I can dare say that I have better playing, stamina and smash power that time. But right now, I think only 50% left haha.

Above is more like my badminton story =.= but still I do regret I didnt pursue my dream of becoming state player when I was young. Now I'm 22, too late already =(

Signing off,
Andy